Take Two
Obesity in the U.S. is creating a new problem- for me. I usually don't care how large people are. Obesity doesn't disgust me on sight and I don't think less of extra large people. BUT last night I was sitting peacefully at a seminar when the obesity problem in the U.S. started to weigh heavily on my mind. This lady came to sit in the empty seat next to me and at first she was rubbing all up on me. I scooted over in my chair a little thinking that another inch would be good for us both, but then she settled into her seat even more and I felt the great pressure of her thigh on my lap. This chick was literally sitting on me. I'm thinking, if you need two seats and you know that you do, just ask me to slid down a seat. She didn't even acknowledge that my body was crushed beneath hers. Couldn't she feel me? I couldn't pay attention to the seminar until my cell phone rang, which gave me a green light to shift in my seat and get free from her. I really felt embarrassed to immediately move over into the next seat just because an obese person sat next to me. I thought that would look kinda rude on my part.. right? Like everyone around us would think I just didn't want to sit next to her. I think it was her responsibility to say, "would you mind moving down?" I'd never know there weren't three in her party. I had to spend the rest of the seminar sitting with one butt cheek in my seat and one in the other because homegirl needed half of my chair. And I bet money that she wasn't crushing her friend on her left side. I think she spared her friend and nearly paralyzed me. Dear overweight people, If you need more room, politely ask for it. Don't oppress the person sitting next to you if you don't have to. Take two seats if that's what you need, especially when they're free. - Super Thanks!
I think my thigh is hurting right now just thinking about it.
5 Comments:
Dear MBT,
I have recently come face-to-face with obesity, too. A friend of mine just moved into a house in Greensboro. It's one of these very big, very old, very "Bohemian" houses. The kind where people who don't shower often rotate in and out of rooms with regularity. (For the record my friend showers; she is very clean.)
One of the itinerants of the household is a very large woman. Very, very large. Like you, I do not have issues with large people. They do their thing, I do mine, and we meet from time to time at life's buffet tables. However, this large woman has crossed a line with me, because she is "a toucher." Yes, she enjoys "the touching."
When she talks to me she likes to touch me on my arm with her hand, or on my hand with her hand, or even on my both hands with her both hands. I'm generally not down with unsolicited touching, but hers is especially problematic because her hands are gelatinous (like gelatin) in nature. Also once I watched her scratch between her stomach-fat folds and then touch my hand with her hand. Oh and I nearly forgot to mention, there are distinct odors emanating from said fat folds.
I don't want to be rude. Should I start wearing a "Don't touch me fatty" T-shirt? I need advice.
Signed,
Now I hate gelatin
P.S. Once I honest-to-god saw her smuggle a box of saltines into a bar and eat them all. This is not a joke.
Ritchie Five,
Thanks for sharing. I'm willing to be that said chubby chick is quite intelligent. I went to a university where there were basically no fat people, but when i saw one i would assume he or she was really, really really smart because they probably stayed home and studied, with a box of snacks no doubt. Anyway, my point is that she's probaby bright enough to pick up subtle, or not-so subtle, clues. If you simply back out of her reach when you guys are talking or when you see one of those gelatin-wrapped phalanges are reaching for you- she'll quickly get the point. Don't SAY anything, because that's rude. But, touchers have to be used to the strange looks that mean "stop touching me." In fact, you could also try to stop listening to her and start staring at her hand the next time it touches you.. but not in disgust, because that's rude.
I meant, to say, I'm willing to bet that she's ...
Isn't the difference between fat, chubby and overweight all about personality? Is it like the more you like someone or the nicer they are the lighter they seem? I mean, on America's Next Top Model they treat girls that are like 130 pounds like whales, because they all hate each other.
I think what I'm saying is that all overweight people aren't "fat" if that makes any sense at all. It does to me.
Sho Nuff!
As irritating as a Touch-Talker is, she at least sounds intelligent and can carry on a conversation. I can tolerate that more so then a complete idiot Bobblehead-talker that adds nothing to a conversation and just talks to hear their own voice. But if you do want a T-Shirt, let me know and I'll get you something done up.
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