Remember when picking a ring for you phone used to take hours?

I just got a new cell phone and it brings me SO MUCH JOY. It makes me giddy like the moment the sexy boy you've been eyeing hollas at you, or a $10 pair of Banana Republic pants, or free Ben & Jerrys or free bottle service at the club.. I'm talking happy. I can't emphasis how much better I feel now that I can walk around freely without having to recharge my battery every 5 minutes. Plus, I'm a text messaging fool now because I have a QWERTY keyboard and a text messaging package. I can capitalize with ease and add question marks in one swift move..I'm feeling higher than Whitney Houston about my level of connectivity right now.

Plus, I've fallen pretty hard for Verizon's ringback tones. I currently have three at .99 per month. I mean, you can't just let the same song ride forever, right? Trust me I tried and I had to hear people whine about how tired they were of my song. But you've already bought rights to the song for one year, so you can't just let it sit in your box. That's stupid..

But that's not why I'm mad. I mean it irks me a little, but I'm cool with that. I'm mad because I went through my ringtones yesterday on my new phone that brings me so much joy. I have like one suitable ringtone, the others are all beeps or wack "brrring, brrring" style rings. There are like three or four melody rings (including "When the Saints Come Home" and something suitable only for day care workers) and so I went with the same tone I used to have. Something Latin that sounds like the "Sex In the City" theme song. But here's my thing. This fucking phone retails for $400, I paid far less for it of course. Why in Sam Hill does it only come with one damn ringtone? Well, we all know why, because we're supposed to be downloading ringtones. But for real, honestly, I don't want to hear "Miss New Booty" or "Stuntin Like My Daddy" or "I'm Bossy" or any song every time my phone rings -or everytime someone elses phone rings. I just don't. In fact, they know that, which is why ringtones are such a big business. You can't just have one, once you start you'll need one every month. That's 12 a year. And that's before you get the bright idea to specialize rings for your different friends. Can I get one free to get me going? NO!!!! That'd be too convenient. If it's not one thing it's another with these frigging cell phone companies.

Oh, and yesterday one of my coworkers pulled up next to me on the road and was like, hey what are you listening to an iPod? I was like, dawg, this is a headset. I'm on the phone. LOL. He was like, oh. So now I need a wireless headset, because my headset has gone the way of the bag phone it seems. Don't even get me started on that.

Yo, remember the bag phone?!! My momma had one.. lmao.